7? 7? I'm in Heaven!

Our little one has made it to 7 mos.  She is adorable as ever.  She moves a ton and this is the picture could get of her that was still enough.  We took her to the park today and Ginny caught a few delightful shots of Kaylor on the swing for the first time.  We had her laughing pretty hard but when the camera came out, all went quiet.  How does she know?!  So, Ginny got between Kaylor and the camera so she could try to get her to laugh.  She only gave us a portion of laughter.  

• She is still using anything that will stand still for more than 5 seconds to pull herself up.  
• She crawls with a janky leg.  It's fairly hilarious.  
• She is laughing more.  
• No teeth yet, but she is chewing on everything in sight.  
• She loves dogs and is intrigued by them.  
• She's eating everything we give her and very well.  
• She can feed herself!  She can pick up things with her hand and even has then pincer grasp.  
• She wakes up very happy and likes to babble.
• She loves to play with her baby cousins.  

Our new travels...

An update you say?  For those of you only on here to look at Kaylor, here's your fix.

She is standing any opportunity she gets the chance.  Yes, she's only 6 mos, but almost 7!  We also got a "little" mirror to attach in the car so we can see her in the rear view mirror and so she can see herself.  This is the fourth one we've tried.  The first one only stayed on the window for a few minutes.  The second one was sufficient but we wanted something bigger.  We found another one that was bigger and had music and flashing lights but the batteries were drained very quickly.  So we decided to go with this one.  It works perfectly.  She likes to sleep with her froggie!  She's actually been doing so much better at sleeping through the night.  Hopefully, this will continue!

So, for those of you actually worried about us.  We have been in Arizona for two months now.  After much prayer, we have decided to move to California; the same city Ginny is from.  There is a ton of family there and we will a great support system, plus the weather is a lot better than Arizona and Louisiana.  We will be living with Ginny's uncle and aunt until we get jobs and find a place of our very own.  I've already applied at several locations and Ginny has had an interview and has three other jobs she has applied for.  Things will work out.

We have been so confused as to what's been going on with our lives but we know this; we were supposed to come to Arizona and we are supposed to move to California now.  We also know this has been for our benefit.  We have been stuck together with each other for 2 mos. straight and our relationship is stronger for it.  We know each other better now and are so happy to be together.  Plus, we've seen our creative side in finding things to do on a low budget in a hot area. 

We move to California Tuesday and are way excited.  We feel like it's the best for us all.  Westward Ho!

Drug Free Part 2

I must mention that I devote a lot of my success to getting off of this medication because I try to live a moderately healthy lifestyle.  I limit carbonated, caffeinated, and/or sugary beverages to a minimum.  We only have these beverages in our home if company is coming and they want it or on special occasions.  I also try to exercise daily, even if it's just a few laps around the pool or a walk down the canal behind our home. 

Also, I try to stay very positive and have positive self-talk.  Yes, I talk to myself.  You do too; if you don't, you need to start.  Also, I never saw this is "I have an anxiety disorder".  I simply had a bout of anxiety that led me to have stress in my life which caused my body to betray me.  I guess that's why people just say, "I have an anxiety disorder."; it's much easier to say that. But I feel that if I say that then I am owning up to some disorder I am not willing to have around forever. 

When Ginny was pregnant with Kaylor, we went through a series of lessons associated with hypnotherapy for natural childbirth.  There was an audio track I listened to in order to help me know my place in the delivery room.  It helped me to understand how to stay calm and be there for Ginny.  I have learned that simply telling myself, "You are ok.  You are in a safe place.  You are safe.  You are fine.  Nothing is wrong with you.  Your body is ok.  Your heart is ok" among many other affirmations, I can relieve myself of the stress or anxiety.  For me, I can do this anytime but sometimes I might have to sit still with my eyes closed to get a stronger effect.

Ginny also helps in my endeavors.  Mainly, she helps as part of the team we call a family.  She fills in where I cannot make it.  She takes up my slack and I take up hers.  We work together to be sure our lives are as good as they can be.

Lastly, my strength also comes from the gospel.  I understand that prayer is important for my health and well being.

Now, I no longer take this medication and hopefully can allow stress to escape my life. 

Drug free.

I'm not sure I mentioned much about anxiety and the effect it has on me.  I am going to be as diplomatic about this as I can with being as honest as I can.  My main object for this post is to help those who have had, think they have or may ever have an anxious situation.  Oh, does that cover everyone? OK!

Last year, about this same time, I started to have some physical discomfort.  Over a period of weeks, my chest became really tight, my breathing became labored and I felt light headed.  All symptoms came and went as unwelcome guests.  I have always been go-go-go and don't like to sit still or idol in anyway.  I didn't understand, however, that all of this has a great bit to do with how I handled stress at that time in my life.

One day, I was sitting on the couch, feeling uneasy at our home and looked at Ginny, my confidant, my joy, my trustworthy companion.  She has an extensive medical knowledge so I thought she might be able to assist me.  I was feeling tightness in my chest, lightheaded, and shortness of breath.  The room began to spin (the first time I have ever experienced this outside of spinning in circles as a child).  I told Ginny something was wrong and then proceeded to have stronger feelings of discomfort.  I mentioned all of this to Ginny and asked what I should do.  Then I felt I was about to pass out.  Ginny instructed me to lie down on the bed and to prop my legs up, above my heart so all the blood to flow towards my brain.  We were quite worried about what was happening.  My cousin Lolita was living with us, thankfully.  We thought I might be having a reaction to too much sugar so I started eating protein to counterbalance it.  I downed about 1 liter of water.  Then we finally concluded I must be having a panic attack.  My bishop came over and gave me a blessing.

The attack was disturbing and very dissatisfying, to say the least. My body had finally said, "enough is enough.  You need to slow down!"  It had betrayed me.  I was under the impression we were friends but we were in a very bad place in our relationship, apparently.  I was being quite uncooperative and not heeding the promptings it had given me up until this time.

I went to the doctor and like the majority of Americans, was too busy to do anything else but ask for a quick fix.  I received a Rx. for an anti-anxiety medication, paroxentine (the generic version of Paxil).  I had a companion on my mission with this same medication and felt it was safe and, anyways, needed something to help me and needed it now!  I was working a full-time job and going to summer school.  I didn't have time to do anything but get something in my system that would allow me to continue living the lifestyle I had become accustomed to.

Well, the medication worked.  It was very hard to get used to, however. Luckily, my Aunt Bea has gone through some of the same concerns before and was very helpful through this ordeal.  I'm sure I called her more than was needed or wanted but it became apparent to me that I needed help and that help had to come from outside sources.  There were many side effects I experienced, dry mouth, ( constipation needs to come next to sound like a commercial but I did not experience this, thanks to ole' friend, Lactose Intolerancy) light-headed, brain zaps (nerve-like shocks through my brain and upper extremities; mainly in the front lobe and eye sockets), and even extra bouts of anxiety.

Fast-forward to a year later.  My prescription was only for a year.  I had to make a decision.  Without insurance, do I go to a doctor to renew my prescription?  Do I slowly ween myself off of this prescription with or without a doctor's care; again, with no insurance?  or Do I just stop taking the prescription all together, cold turkey and see how it works.

After consulting with my wife and a pharmacist and after some web searching ( NO WEB MD ), I decided to cut cold turkey.  I forgot one time to take my medicine and decided this was the time to stop.  I was concerned about all of the withdrawal symptoms mentioned by others who have stopped.  Some of the same side effects effected me after stopping the medication, mainly brain zaps/shocks, which also lead to a bit of nausea and being lightheaded.  I am now 10 days off of the medication and I feel fine.  I'm still experiencing some brain shocks, but they are mostly mild and I know they won't last forever. I'll post more later.